dreaming machines for karolina maria konstancja ossowska

gazing into the reality of desire

i only see you again.
and when i cannot speak to you,
it is as if my own ear were torn off.
the taste of your voice before sleep, precious metal, liquid,
fantastic resource. red streaks on the inner thigh of memory.
these are the hormonal enchantments of life.
the child, the key to inner reality, it all comes forth,
through you, for me. and when not...nervous nightmare,
i am hooves faltered in mud.
my flower of mind throws you desperate spore.
drawing myself in again, the pale
doctrine of my own perplexed necessity,
fair, like your flesh, grows flush, brightens, glows,
subtly beating wings of a moon,
frothing the oceans of sleep, silently.

6 lutego 2009
poznan

after glancing back over pasolini

for lee foust

from the first words, "solo il amare, solo il conoscere/conta..."
"only loving, only knowing/matters
not having loved, not having known.."
i see my old friend, he, my old friend, you
arrives in an image, inside an image, of the poem

at once announcing the moment, the eternal break with(in) "history"
(that repeats itself in unbroken successions
of miserable bastard cacophonies, wars for peace
and fleshless dreamers---like skeletons dug form the rubbles of gaza---

and yet faces into the world, benjamin's angel, the mouth of klee
"set at the margin", so to speak a foregone apocalypse
in which survivors scrounge in dirt and rubbish,
the ones who carry history nevertheless like a senseless bag
full of deposit bottles, in exchange for a future

repetitious, anxious, yet brimming with the possibility
knowing thirst unvanquishible, the tongue yearning,
replacing their teeth in advanced age, limping and smiling forward
(with whatever backlashed dreams and dead families
those same smiles mask over)

reminding me all again this morning
on my kasprzaka street stairs
the old lady descending, one slippered foot swollen, unbootably
the other boot cautious, testing her step
hand glued to the gleaming railing, eyes on a distant goal,
did not betray seeing me

as i was out into frigid air and
already whisking back again, she was only out the door
moving so steadily, barely--where-ever--
into that wind
i was coming from...
that i thought myself
so much weaker than she

02.2.09-------------- Poznań

i see no way to move foward people, i suggest we levitate

apparition between memory and forgetting

if there are dandelions left

growing in winter

it will certainly be

an all night affair

i said to myself
just as you closed the door...

somewhere between
house and home

some missed destination
between brain and bone

some combination
between nowhere gone
and nowhere to go

comes
in an apparition
a bright leaf
on a once broken bough

somehow
a veined leaf--falls--
an apparition
or a chemical
cloud

a wave or tickle
between memory
& forgetting
calls

an apparition
a face
knowing nothing
and more than that all

a worm of spring
a touch of gold

once a shadow
an apparition
between memory
& forgetting

it could be that
just that
an endless more

between rouge and soot
between the shoe and the boot
it could be that
and nothing more
everything to share

and i said to myself
as you closed the door

if there are dandelions left
growing in winter
it will certainly be
an all night affair

25.1.09
poznan

THESES IN NOISE II

CONTRA/other THESES ON NOISE

1)Noise is centrifugal, not centripital. There can be no consensus on Noise. Noise moves away from all centers of identification. There will always be more Noise than one can listen to. Inappropriateness is the priority of Noise.

2)Mothers against Noise(M.A.N.)is most likely a creation of the publicity department of Village Youth ltd., a NYC based corporation involved in bringing noise in line with corporate marketing standards for decades.

3) Noise is not an object (nor an objective) but rather a complex of occasions. One cannot be a Noisicean for the very same reason musicians are not in control of muses. One controls a vehicle for delivery but not what it carries: who can tell the truck-load of chickens when to cluck? Noise cannot be shaped.

4) One is at the mercy of noise. Noise is not always heard. While it is true that the largest of our noises tend to be noticeable socially, there is also another level to Noise that is infra/super/sonic. Our bodies are carriers of this noise. Noise is deeper than any throat.

5) Noise is a method of displacement of energy. Like the calm of the storm, it is only temporary. Noise cannot survive. Noise is anxious about nothing. There are no devices that record/register Noise.

Jeff Gburek

June 26, 2006

Berlin, Allemagne

Eurasia

THESES IN NOISE

Theses on Noise

I What the fuck is Noise? Precisely because of its indeterminacy noise is the most sensuous human activity / practice. To try to fix it or to make it a genre is as fucked up as believing in democracy.

II If you make noise it is likely that somebody else is going to hear you,
this means Noise is a social activity.

III The capacity to make Noise is available to all, but its revolutionary
potential comes from those who want to disturb the commodification of
Noise - as M.A.N point out in their website www.mothersagainstnoise.us.

IV To say “this is good Noise” or “that is bad Noise” is to miss the point.

V Noise without meaning nor finality is revolutionary as long as it does
not support anything or anybody.

VI This is not to say that Noise under capitalism can be an autonomous
activity. But if neither language nor bombs help you to destroy our
reality, Noise helps us to get rid of our anxiety.

VII It is more important to fuck the minds of the audience than to fuck your
ears - and vice versa.

VIII The identity process that occurs as people are making Noise must be
constantly rejected. To be a “Noisician” is even more pathetic than to
be a “musician”.

IX Factory workers in the previous centuries have indirectly been the most
sustained and brutal players of Noise. Recognition of our past should
always be present.


X Economic exploitation still occurs, even if now the production of Noise
does not produce an object. The process of Noise making has in itself
become the object of financial and symbolic market value.


XI The old conception of noise was to believe in freedom, the new
conception of Noise is to achieve freedom.


Mattin 25th May 2006, London Anti-Copyright
www.mattin.org

NOT ABOUT IMPROVISATION

all sounds being singular and unrepeatable, every sound must in fact be improvised. improvised, in this sense, must mean that there is something in the event of sound that is unforeseen. a sound in which the unforeseen happens. the improvised is the imprevised, the imprevisible. even the sounds in a composed sequence will, if slowed down or sped up, either in actual execution or through manipulation of a recording, will reveal the instabilities and stabilities that return to each sound this crisis of the border.

the improvised has a profile in the unforeseable and therefore the invisible of a therefrom or unto

that which we call the silence

that which i call the stone